Work in Progress: Strength or Weakness?

I have been working with a client for about 6 months now and she has made so many advancements in her health, far beyond the number on the scale. She is not afraid to dig deep and do the work, and that has unearthed some difficult feelings and emotions resulting in her feeling like she is either moving backward or at a standstill. She has apologized multiple times over the last month, thanking me for my patience and apologizing for being a "work in progress".

This is where my view of work in progress is different from hers. She was viewing this as a deficit or weakness or even as a sign that she is not moving forward with her health and wellness goals. I view it as a strength. The reality is, we are ALL works in progress. Being a work in progress means that you are able and willing to evolve and grow and fight through the discomfort that results from doing the deep work. 

If you view your life simply as a series of goals to achieve, you run the risk of feeling completely unfulfilled at all times. This sounds crazy, right? If you reach all your goals, you are successful, motivated and on top of the world right? Maybe not. I have written on this before, it's a concept called post-goal attainment letdown. I liken this to the day after Christmas blues. You make the shopping list, buy and decorate the tree, wrap the gifts, cook all the yummy food, then it's "all over" in 15 minutes. You are potentially left exhausted and in more credit card debt than 2 months ago, and all that positive energy around the Holiday is gone. 

When working toward a goal, you have a clear direction, concrete action steps, and can evaluate with data as you move along your path. But then what? You reach the goal and you feel empty and even lost because now you don't have that clear roadmap to follow.

"And if that all seems too simple, you have neuroscience kicking you in the face while you're down. The brain releases dopamine, a hormone associated with both motivation and happiness, in anticipation of reward. So when you plan and know you're going to work for something, you're in biological position to feel good. Each milestone gives you another dopamine hit, which makes you want to keep going with the job. But when you reach your goal, that release of dopamine drops. It's harder for you biochemically to have joy."

If you can frame your life in terms of values vs. goals you have a bigger picture. If you are living in alignment with your VALUES and can take DAILY actions that are a direct reflection of your values, that's when you will succeed long term. By succeed, I mean that you will feel more fulfilled. You will feel like you are contributing and sharing your unique gifts with the world and making the most of your time on this earth.  

Being a work in progress means being alive. If you are not a work in progress, you may be living but are not truly alive. If you are interested in finding YOUR unique character strengths and values, take the quiz HERE and reach out, let's chat!

I would love to hear your take on this subject. Do you think that being a work in progress is a strength or weakness?